Here is the letter which I promised to write. I have several reasons for writing you this letter. First, I hope to make my reasons for ending our relationship clearer to you. I fear that you do not understand exactly what happened between us. Perhaps you think I made a rash decision I will come to regret, or perhaps you are still under the impression that "Mary broke us up." Neither of these is true. Actually, it was a long, complex process that I had to go through, in order to reach this point. I want you to understand how I felt throughout the course of our relationship, and how I arrived at the very difficult decision to end it. Believe me, it was not at all easy.
Second, and more importantly, is my genuine hope that you will be able to learn something from all this. I care about you, and I want you to be happy. You truly deserve to be in a happy relationship in the future. However--and this is only my opinion--I suspect that this is unlikely to happen unless you understand and change certain aspects of your behavior. I feel almost morally obligated to point out these things to you, and to address the possible underlying issues. I honestly do not think you are even aware of some of the things you do. Someone needs to tell you, and if it's not me, then I don't know who else it will be. I feel that if I didnít tell you, then in the long run I would possibly be hurting you. I understand that my presenting you with these issues is one thing, but that your understanding and learning from them is another matter entirely, which at this point is out of my hands.
Finally, I need to get all these things off my chest, to purge them all and be done with it, and to continue moving on with my life. I have learned many lessons from this painful experience. It is now time for me to take what I have learned and and move on to a better future. So, in a way, this letter serves as a kind of "closure" for me.
I apologize for the sheer length of this letter. I feel that I have not been able to express my feelings for the last two years without retaliation, therefore I have a lot to say now. There are so many things I need to tell you that it really does seem overwhelming. Rather than providing a long "laundry list" of complaints I will attempt to adhere to a specific format--the story of our relationship from my perspective. Throughout this letter I will be citing numerous examples, some of which I will set apart in italics. These are not meant to dredge up dirt from the past, but simply to point out to you samples of your own behavior. If I did not provide examples, you would probably angrily think, "What the hell is she talking about?!"